As many would be impressed by the trinkets of this world, money, cars, clothes and fame. There is a special type of ladies that don’t really care about all that, or maybe they are too busy to notice them. Am talking about the single mothers. Now since we are on the topic of single mothers let’s first define them. A single mother is a strong woman who raises and provides for the kids all by herself. That’s what we all know but I would also like to include this certain group of women. They are married and living with the husbands but they handle all the responsibilities, both financially and domestically. Either the husband is a deadbeat or simply ignorant. Anyways, ladies, I do feel some pain for you. Imagining how you are the last to go to bed and the first to wake up.
The cold morning breeze, you wish you could continue sleeping and bury your exhausted body under that blanket but you can’t. You have a purpose, goals and a thousand issues to handle both at home and at work. So you snap out of it and drag yourself out of the bed, you start by making breakfast, wake up the kids to prepare them for school, do the house chores, take the kids to school or they walk themselves to school and take the little one to the daycare and finally leave to work. With no help from no soul, you are a superwoman you do it all. From a mother now you are trying to be the best employee you can ever be for your a*****e of a boss who doesn’t notice your effort.
But that doesn’t stop you from working as hard as you can because you have a family to feed, fees and rent to pay, not forgetting the old folks back at up country. So you do your best and from time to time you pat your shoulder and congratulate yourself for the good job you’ve done since you can’t get it from anyone else. Even at work, you don’t stop being a mother from time to time your kids keep crossing your mind, you get worried about them but mostly the little one, whom you left with a stranger at the daycare. No matter how long you’ve known this person you still have some insecurities about them. You are not sure if the kid will be fed, or treated right and start having some flashbacks about the ‘house girl in Uganda who mistreated the kid and was caught on camera’ there are no cameras at daycare, not a comfortable place for your kid to be but it’s cheap and that’s what you can afford. You try to brush it all off and focus on the load of work you have to do. Tick Tock! Tick Tock!, time is up, it’s super late but you managed to finish the work that nobody appreciates and you are trying to rush back home.
Since it’s rush hour, the fare is up, you decide to walk for a little distance not just today, you usually do that to cut the cost. You try to walk as fast as you can, thinking too much and trying so hard not to think out loud as people would mistake you for a crazy lady. You get in a public transport ‘matatu’ as most of us call them. The matatu is barely moving because of the crazy jam so you start dozing off, not as your own wish but you just can’t help it. After a while, you get to your destination and you can hear from far the conductor yelling your stage.
You get out of the matatu and start another walk to pick your kid from daycare only to find that he/she had the same diaper the whole day, not as clean as you left him/her, you pay up and carry your baby home. You start with the house chores as bigger kids do their homework, you prepare the meal, you wash the uniforms, clean up the dishes, wash the kids and put them to bed. And finally, you get the chance to sit down, looking at the watch its almost 10 pm. It hits you, you can’t waste any minute, you need to get that sleep so bad. You go to bed and Oops! You remember that you have a husband. That’s the only time you people share ‘the bedtime’.
He is waiting there patiently to make more babies or just to donate some sperms since he is not taking care or them. But in your head you know for sure he is not getting some tonight, you get in the bed turn on your side and say goodnight. He tries to touch you but your body can’t handle any extra curriculum activity this night. You stop him, he gets mad and starts up an argument and even threatens to go out and get it somewhere else, not knowing at this point you don’t really care, you have enough on your plate. After a while, the sound of silence kicks in and you get your peaceful sleep. And repeat the same routine for 20+ years or maybe 10 when you decide to let go of that good for nothing husband and get yourself a more responsible man, or maybe it starts coming together your hard work pays off. Got yourself a good job, good house, good car because all of these nice things take time, patience and hard work. Somebody said ‘Success is not sexually transmitted’ go figure. I respect single and independent women and I celebrate you all